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Funniest Pond Tales-Half 1, Might 2004

Funniest Pond Tales-Half 1, Might 2004

Prepare for some gut-wrenching, snigger out loud hilarious pond
tales from everywhere in the world…

(Continued from Might Challenge of PondStuff!)

We had some hilarious, really intestine wrenching, snigger out-loud
tales despatched in by a few of you. Right here we’ll spotlight
a few of the funniest tales so that you can learn.

We had entries from everywhere (Inluding one all the way in which
from THAILAND!) The competitors was fierce, and to be sincere – I
had a very onerous time deciding on one ‘funniest’ story, however
here is a quick rundown of our entries: cats, canine, and bunnies
(?) all taking the Nestea plunge proper into the water, a hungry
KOI nibbling in harmful territory, a lacking flip flop, an
electrifying expertise for grandma, enjoyable for the entire household,
fish frape, and flying fish in addition!

First, let’s begin with this very joke about ‘Smokey’ –
who apparently thinks he can stroll on water. This was despatched in by
Mike Lachance from Maryland:

Humorous Pond Story #1

“I want I had a photograph to share of this very true story however any
ponder with cats has seemingly had the identical expertise at a while
or one other. A number of years in the past, after I was having fun with the second
season of my first pond (I’ve now constructed 4 as I’ve moved
round), considered one of our cats, “Smokey”, who was a pure hunter in
her prime, noticed a mockingbird alight on a lilly pad to get a drink
of water. Nicely, outdated “Smokester” slowly crept out from beneath some
day lillies and made a spectacular bounce with all 4 paws
majestically carrying her like a flying squirrel, proper for that
intruding chook.

It’s not as if she had not already had a few
encounters with the water however that day the feathered deal with should
have been an excessive amount of for her to cross up. Nicely, each my spouse and I
have been there to see her make a beautiful stomach flop into the pond.

After all, the chook was out of the way in which in loads of time and I
swear that that cat walked on her toes the 5 ft it took her
to get out of the water! And naturally, after eradicating herself
from the water, in a really nonchalant method, proceeded to raise
every leg, shake off the water and as a lot as say “I meant to do
that, you recognize”.

Smokey usually hung out on the pond later, utilizing her tail to
appeal to the fish (she would put it within the water and swish it
round and the fish would come as much as discover it. She by no means did
catch one). She additionally beloved to take a seat on the waterfall and benefit from the
water transferring previous her. So that’s my humorous pond story.

=== Humorous Pond Story #2

“Expensive all at McArthur,

My funniest pond story is about my late aunt, who launched me
to the enjoyment of yard ponds. Donna had a big koi pond in her
yard that she devoted countless quantities of affection and a focus
to. As occurs with most ponds, spring introduced some uninvited
company…on this case frogs. One night Donna was engaged on the
pond, checking the cantankerous pump and filter system, and utilizing
her web to skim out leaves and what not that had blown in.

My 80+ plus yr outdated grandmother was supervising the work and
providing her professional opinion on how you can proceed. They have been amazed
on the variety of frogs that had taken up residence, and never too
glad about it. Donna observed a frog swimming on the far aspect of
the pond that she wished to get out…one thing was not fairly
proper about the way in which he was swimming, and she or he pointed him out to
Grandma. “Mother, take a look at that frog swimming on his again!” Grandma
was a bit skeptical…frogs doing the again stroke have been a
phenomenon that she was unfamiliar with.

She suggested that this misfit ought to be eliminated instantly. Do not
need to give the opposite little froggies unusual concepts. Donna made
a number of makes an attempt at scooping the miscreant up together with her web, however
he was simply out of attain. Just one factor left to do. Roll up your
shorts and wade in after him. The reply to Mr. Frogs unusual
swimming method turned painfully apparent as quickly as Donna
reached his instant neighborhood….a defective beneath water gentle had
shorted and electrocuted him! Donna did not want her electrical
rollers for a number of days after that!”

Enecia Sabroff

Humorous Pond Story #3

“Whats up—-My husband lately purchased a beagle pet, presently
he was 8 weeks outdated. My husband additionally purchased two virtually, semi-tame
rabbits to assist practice the pet to trace rabbits. Right now I
solely had one pond that was preformed 550 gallons, my husband put
one of many rabbits out to platy with the pet, the rabbit was
teasing the pet, working a bit methods then leaping over his
head, then the rabbit determined he did not need to play anymore so
he began to run from Bear (the pet), and he dove into the
pond. We have been considering that Bear would go across the pond to
the opposite aspect and proceed chasing the bunny, however Bear simply dove
proper in, he was so little although that he needed to be rescued from
the small yard pond. My husband’s solely response was “he is
going to be a superb rabbit canine!” Nicely, thanks for listening to
my story. Sincerely, Roberta Collins Toledo, Ohio

Humorous Pond Story #4

“A narrative to share…

Two years in the past I began with the loopy concept of constructing a small
pond with koi fishes. After plenty of working I lastly constructed it,
and adorned it with all form of crops. Someday… mi feminine
cat “Manchita” went to the pond to look at this new
building. She went to the border, jumped on a flat stone and
starter to drink water. To her huge shock one of many fishes ,
presumably considering that the white nostril of my cat was meals, jumped
out of the water, attempting to eat it.. Are you able to think about the
shock of the cat ? I consider that the fish was additionally fairly
impressed with the expertise. My cat virtually fell into the pond ,
.. and from then on she by no means went across the pond once more. She
used to look at the pond from my dorm, situated within the second ground
and simply throughout the pond. Sadly I didn’t take an image
of this “accident”. I’m sending you a pictute of this primary
pond; within the meantime I did construct one other, bigger one.
Sadly “Manchita” will not be round any extra, she handed away
a number of month in the past, from outdated age.. This story occurred in Valdivia,
a metropolis situated within the south of Chile. On this nation winter is
approaching, with a number of leaves falling from the timber an the
crops in my pond making ready themselves to sleep for some time…”
Maria Fresard


Humorous Pond Story #5

“I’ve two ponds. An higher and decrease pond. The higher pond is fed
by a waterfall with the supply being the decrease pond (pushed by a
pump). The decrease pond is fed by an overflow of the higher pond
that flows underground for about 70 ft (12 in drain pipe). Final
summer season I rescued some trout fingerlings from a seasonal stream
going dry close to my house. I put them within the decrease pond. This spring
I used to be sitting in my kitchen and will see one thing flopping on
my water fall. The trout had migrated up the overflow tube and
have been attempting to swim additional upstream by way of the water falls. No so
humorous however does present the power of nature. Only a few weeks in the past,
Egrets discovered the pond and the fish.

There may be nothing left emigrate presently. Not so humorous however
does an Egret style something like a turkey when cooked?”

Tom Gegenheimer


Humorous Pond Story #6

“We have now solely had a pond for a short while … particulars may be seen
at http://thailand4life.web/smithgarden/

The joke should embrace the workmen (in Thailand) who took
zero security precautions when developing the pond.

Watching guys shovelling concrete from a lorry and spreading it
throughout the underside of the pond … when the footwear they’d was
simply ‘flip-flops’ resulted in nice leisure …. particularly
when. a number of instances, the flip flops got here off and have been misplaced within the
cement someplace (finally discovered whereas they walked round naked
footed) …. photos at




Unusually it was solely the blokes …. the ladies laborers all wore
Wellington boots …. possibly this displays on which of the sexes
is admittedly probably the most wise?” Regards, Chris


Humorous Pond Story #7

“I’m constructing a pond presently and I used to be within the means of
constructing a waterfall within the nook of a fence. The waterfall is
about 3 ft excessive and seven ft broad. I believed I used to be ending up
the waterfall with some flat rock on the very high. So I
straddeled thewaterfall with my knees on the second ledge and set
the flat rock on high. After I did this the entire waterfall fell
down as a result of I construct it on blocks and never a pile of dust.

When it fell one huge rock caught my foot and I slide down the
fall and fell backwards into the pond going all the way in which beneath and
had a few huge rocks come down on me. In the meantime my spouse is
laughing her butt of at me and I requested her to assist me out she
slipped on the flat moist rock that surrounded the ponds edge and
half manner fell in with me.

Now my two boys have been enjoying within the yard they’re 5 and three and noticed
this occur to us and so they thought it was time to received swimming so
guess who jumped into the pond with us, the boys. Nothing like
having the entire household in on the pond. We laughed for awhile however
then I needed to rebuild the entire waterfall once more and this time I
put the highest rocks on from the aspect.”

Robert H Coppa Jr.


Humorous Pond Story #8

I made a decision 300 gallons can be good. I did all the mathematics and
spent an excessive amount of time working with extra skilled
ponders. Someway when it was all mentioned and completed my little 300
gallon pond ended up being 810 gallons and are available to seek out out it
was yet one more considered one of my mathematical errors. Guess I ought to
have paid extra consideration in that school degree math class
required for my Associates, proper.

We received the pond all up and working however due to the
miscalculation we now wanted a much bigger pump to feed the waterfall
so I went to our native water backyard provider and requested which one
to get. Funds was a priority so it was really useful that we received a
¾ HP submersible pump that cycles 44 gallons a minuet. It was
solely $70 compared to the $170 one which was its comparative
different so… we went that route. $70 {dollars} later we had a
working pond with a lovely waterfall! I used to be so excited I might
hardly wait to get fish.

Once more funds was a priority so we went to the native pet retailer and
picked up $50 {dollars} price of fish, about 8 fish. 4 massive gold
Koi, some yellow and a blue Koi. The colour excited me a lot I
by no means thought-about what would occur when the fish turned
comfy of their new house. The swam round investigating for
a day or two then began to come back up lacking. I had it figured
that they have been hiding or {that a} cat was getting fed to nicely however I
by no means figured it was one thing I might have completed. It was the
pump… the consumption valve on the pump was to massive and the fish have been
getting to shut and being sucked into the pump although the motor
pushed down the hose into my waterfall.

Whereas this isn’t a joke, I should have cried for 3 days, I
wished to share it as a result of that is the one factor I by no means learn
something about in all of the 6 weeks of studying I did on the net. I
can chuckle about it now with a ‘I am unable to consider I did not assume
of that’ thought.

Had I recognized this was attainable I’d have completed one thing to
stop it by caging in my pump or spending the additional $100 to
get the proper of pump.

Hope another person can save a Koi by my mixing expertise.


New to ponds and already considering of constructing it fish free!” Sheri


Nicely that is it for this yr’s ‘Funniest Pond Tales’… Hope
you loved them as a lot as I did!

Perry Mason S01E06

#Funniest #Pond #StoriesPart

Funniest Pond Tales-Half 1, Might 2004


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